I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You need a sexual gate keeper
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
