just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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