Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
