i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
