O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize