come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize