If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
