): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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