Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Randomize
