I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Less talking, more tequila
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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