hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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