your parents love me but you hate me
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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