So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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