Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
