Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
