Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
