sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
