you would pick up someone in the library
In America we eat man semen.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
