some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So vagazzling was a success
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
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