I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize