come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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