If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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