i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
