She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
So squirting runs in the family.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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