Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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