He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
