she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
