yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
