I skipped work to stalk him.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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