happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
