Do you still have your period?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
