I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
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