looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
