I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
