you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Randomize