Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Randomize
