How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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