I don't think brook has ever known best
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize