My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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