he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Sext me about skeletons
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
