You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
he shaved USA in his pubs
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
