At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
