Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
