I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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