i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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