We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize