How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
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