i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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