I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
