i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
