i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
