Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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