PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
